Kanye West, Big Sean & Jay Z are severely unchill guys. I have no idea what “Hit Boy” is, I think his name is very presumptuous and he should learn some modesty. Modesty is chill. The song is schizophrenic, when one person starts talking it’s interrupted by another guy talking. I’m guessing they all don’t like each other and wanted to spoil each others bit. I also found the mispronunciation of ‘Clique’ most disconcerting and it messed with my vibes big time.
Chillwave Cat score – 0/10
Lupe Fiasco is an apt name for man who is quite the fiasco. This song, which has the scary name, “American Terrorist pt.2″ starts off with some nice Chill piano and then he opens his mouth…. I have no idea what he is saying. He sounds like Lenny Kravitz on hard times and that is maybe why he has become a terrorist of music. It has some deeply unchill shoehorned Skrillex bits. It left me feeling sad for Lupe Fiasco, his name is obviously a cry for help. Somebody help this bro chill and show him some good dank.
Chillwave Cat score – 2/10
C2C are foreign, I think they might be Austrian. Their song starts off pretty chill and then it sounds like one of those Foster The People remixes and Foster The People are mad unchill. That Foster-man, he’s always moving around with ants-in-pants being the most unchill bro on the planet. I don’t have time for this nonsense.
Chillwave cat score – 3/10 (the start is pretty chill)
Atlas Genius have so much potential to be chill, for some reason they are fighting the chillness with their ‘synthesisers’ and ‘producers’. The original of this is nearly chillwave gold. The Lenno remix, with it’s petulant handclaps and ‘the world is fun’ (the world is chill) attitude is just something for toddlers and people who like Pandas. Pandas are seriously unchill and need to be extinct. They aren’t cute like cats are, they are just big fat lazy bears.
Chillwave Cat score – 4/10 (Because of the chillness potential of the original)
Finally!! This is so amazing and chill. It reminds me of my gap year donating money to kids in Africa on Paypal. I got them a goat and some seeds, I got sent a photo and they were smiling. You just have to do stuff for other people sometime, y’know? I’m riding some Dank Vibes right now, this is such an awesome feeling.
Chillwave cat score – 9/10 (Mad-Chill)
The Anti-Christ and his brother. I’m a pretty chill cat… however, I would not miss either of these people. If you know what I mean by that? Play this to somebody who is having good vibes and it will kill them instantly. Total vibekiller. NO SCORE.
Chillwave cat score – na/10